Monday, November 27, 2023

The Frugal Femulator

For those of us who are not full-time femulators, maintaining two wardrobes is expensive. But there are ways to cut corners and still femulate elegantly.

When JJ wrote about breast forms last week, it reminded me of my homemade breast forms. Following the recipe of a famous female impersonator (don’t ask me who; it was a long time ago and I don’t remember).

The recipe called for birdseed in a sock. I actually used dried green peas instead of birdseed, as follows:

1. Use birdseed/dried green peas to fill a thin sock (not a thick heavy sock) to the cup size you desire.

2. Tie off the sock as close as possible to the ball of birdseed/dried green peas.

3. Trim off any access sock and fold the remainder over the knot. Under a bra, the knots emulate nipples.

The birdseed breast form was so inexpensive that I made two pairs: a small pair when I just wanted perky breasts and a larger pair when I wanted my-eyes-are-up-here cleavage.

 I made my breast forms over 40 years ago and they are still good to go today. 

By the way, I am naturally well-endowed for a boy… a B- or C-cup depending on the bra. I made the breast forms to use when I wanted more than my natural cleavage.

While we are in the shapewear realm, I’ve never done it, but there are girls like us who fashion foam to make hip and derriere pads to enhance their figures. There are many how-to-do hip/derriere pads on the Internet, so search the net and find a tutorial that suits you.

Borrowing clothes from your wife, mother, sister or daughter is free, but usually frowned upon, so sashay yourself to a goodwill store or a consignment shop. At such establishments, I have had great success buying designer bags and dresses at a substantial savings over their original price.

Just like your boutique or department store, I never get any pushback when I want to try on something at these businesses, But advise you to play dumb and ask where the dressing room is located. When the salesperson directs you to the ladies’ dressing room, you are home free!

Shoes! I used to buy almost all my shoes at Payless. They had some nice styles in big girl sizes at very reasonable prices. Sadly, Payless closed all their brick and mortar stores, so I have been buying most of my shoes at Nine West. Their styles are nice too and they also have big girl sizes (size 12 maximum), but their prices are on the high side, so I wait for their sales and deals when I “need” a new pair of heels.

Sales and deals should be at the top of the list of all femulators. For example, last week during a Black Friday sale, I bought two new dresses that listed for $148 total, but only cost me $57 and included free shipping to boot!

And there are online coupons that can save you money. The coupons can be for free shipping or for a certain percentage off your purchase price. Finding coupons that work is hit out miss, so I signed up for Honey, which performs an automatic hands-off search for coupons when you are paying for your online purchases.

Purchasing makeup at a department store or at a makeup purveyor like Sephora or Ulta is  expensive. Often you can do just as well buying makeup at a drug store, Target, Walmart, etc. Experiment with different brands and you will likely find something inexpensive that works. Some products are better than others, but the savings can be considerable. And last time I checked, many makeup mavens still swear by Maybelline mascara in the pink tube, which you can buy anywhere for a sawbuck.

I always recommend purchasing expensive wigs because inexpensive look like wigs, whereas expensive wigs look more realistic. This is not malarkey – I’ve lost count of the times I received compliments about my latest hairdo only to surprise my admirer when I revealed I was wearing a wig. I guess you may find used wigs where you find used clothing, but I am a little finicky and would never wear a used wig just like I would never wear used shoes or used shapewear. 

Finally, an absolutely free option is to grow your hair out and style it in a feminine manner. 

And so it goes!

Source: Bebe
Wearing Bebe

Still Another Modern Couple
Still Another Modern Couple


  1. Stana -

    Maintaining two wardrobes can be very expensive - especially when a femulator is learning what works and doesn't work on her body. I must have given away several thousand dollars' worth of clothes that no longer suit my style. For those living on a budget, I'd suggest shopping for casual clothing at thrift stores (Goodwill, etc.) to develop s workable style without breaking the budget. Where one should not skimp is on are wigs and breast forms. Cheap wigs and forms, coupled with ill fitting and badly chosen clothes easily identify a femulator from a distance.

    In my case, it took me years to develop a style that works for me. Yes, I could spend even more money on human hair wigs. But that's not being frugal. I make sure that I get a lot of use out of the feminine items that I buy, so that my cost per wearing is as low as possible. Yes, I still have a closet that contains more clothes than the average woman. but I get a lot of wear out of them and blend in well with cisgender females.

    Is my femulation perfect? No. But it will get better with time and with a loss of weight. Since I'm treated well when I'm out and about, I have grown confident in my femininity, and hope that others will be able to do the same with less effort than I put into it....


  2. You still have birdseed breasts you made 40 years ago? I'm surprised they haven't sprouted by now! Sue x

  3. Shopping at thrift stores is an excellent way to build a budget-friendly wardrobe with designer-quality clothing. If you're a size 10 shoe or smaller, you'll find a variety of high heels and ladies' shoes to choose from. To make the most of thrift store shopping, go frequently—maybe once a week. Familiarize yourself with the store layout, and soon you'll breeze through, quickly spotting items you like.

    For makeup, drugstores offer good brands, but Mac Cosmetics stands out. The higher cost is justified by the quality, instruction, and valuable support from makeup artists. The personalized guidance and affirmation make it a worthwhile investment. Paula G

    1. I also have to give a thumbs up to MAC cosmetics for their quality. Once you dial in the product and shade, they just work! Not cheap - but good...😉

  4. Hi Stana, JJ here. Just want to thank you for expanding on my post last week. I did something similar in my early femulating days except I used uncooked rice for a filling. They had a nice heft to them and certainly were inexpensive.

    As far as wigs go, I have to agree that going cheap is not the best move. I firmly believe that actually going to a wig store and trying on several different styles/ colors will get you the one that completes your look. The people who work in these stores have lots of experience and can help you match your existing hair or steer you to another color for a change of pace.

  5. "Frugal?" Once my two kids met me as I was getting off work. I parked my car some distance from the office which was up the steep incline of the downtown business district. My kids huffed and puffed up the incline as I leisure took the walk. "Why don't you pay for parking and avoid this steep walk?" My retort; If I did pay for parking there would be less money for your toys! That change their tune. It is the same with the clothes buying budget. It's close out sales and on-line shopping to extend the budget for dresses and undergarments. I don't know if I would call pseudo breasts of water balloons or the larger Nerf Ball cut in half an issue of frugality or a "bridge too far" if my wife actually stumbled upon commercially made breast forms or butt pads. And, today is Cyber Monday so my email in box is full of enticements to peruse today. A girl has to get shopping. Bye.

    1. I used to live right next to a park with cinder trails for walking and running. I was in my 60's and I walked routinely 2 to 3 miles. I saw kids walking through the park on the way to school moving like tired old people. So I'm not surprised your kids huffed and puffed going up the hill. I guess when you are growing you don't typically have the energy of an adult.


  6. After my wife passed away I got rid of her clothes as they were not my size or style. So, guess what? I'm filling up her former closet with my newly acquired dresses.
    And as my hair is longer than shoulder length I don't need wigs. And I don't need breast forms or socks filled with bird seed as my natural bra cup size is DD.
    And now that I wear dresses most of the time, including being out in public and going to church it's time for me to donate my unused men's clothes.


  7. Melissa RobertsNovember 28, 2023

    I'm currently using the birdseed option for my boobs however, this time I opted to use rice, which works just as well. In my long crossdressing journey with multiple purges, I've had three pair of the silicone forms at one time or another. I prefer them over the rice in a nylon method. Now that I know that I will never again purge, I'm going to take my time and save some funds for some proper silicone forms, perhaps the ones that adhere to the body and also to Stana's point, maybe get a couple of different sizes. A pair of C cups for everyday wear and maybe something a little bigger just for fun! But for now, the rice ball in a nylon stocking is just fine.

  8. "When I “need” a new pair of heels". There is never a time when I don't need a new pair of heels;)