Stuff 134: Caught

By JJ Atwell

Uh-Oh!

A fellow Femulate reader, Tia, wrote to suggest that some crossdressers secretly want to get caught. I had never considered that before. It seems to me that most of us go to great lengths to avoid getting caught. But the more I thought about her proposition, the more it seemed like a good subject for Stuff.

Please understand that I have never tried to get caught, so these are simply my musings.

Forcing “The Talk”

I wonder whether those who secretly want to get caught see it as a way to finally broach the subject with their friends or perhaps their significant other. If you are in the closet but wish you could talk about your crossdressing with someone, finding the right time to bring it up can certainly be difficult. Maybe some people need that extra push to start the conversation.

I’m not sure getting caught is a good way to introduce the subject, though. It seems to me that you would be starting off on the wrong foot—or stiletto.

My advice, for whatever it’s worth, is not to use this method to initiate “the talk.” Instead, find a quiet time when it’s just the two of you and begin a general conversation to get the words flowing.

During that conversation, perhaps mention that you have always found society’s gender roles interesting. Tell her that you admire the way she dresses and that you appreciate her femininity. Be careful not to make her feel that she is not “woman enough.” That may provide a springboard into the subject of crossdressing and why it interests you.

Or it may not. It really depends on the dynamics of your relationship. No, there are no easy answers here.

Loving Danger

Perhaps the desire to get caught is motivated by pure adrenaline—the same thing that makes roller coasters so thrilling. Some people thrive on that kind of excitement. Could the risk of being discovered provide a similar jolt?

Since I’m not that kind of thrill-seeker, I’m probably not the right person to comment further. But I would love to hear from readers who see it that way. You can leave a comment or email me using the contact information below.

Being “Forced”?

I also wondered whether some people want to “suffer the consequences” of getting caught. Perhaps those consequences might include being forced to remain dressed—or being told to wear something even more feminine.

By being “forced” to dress, they can sidestep the guilt that many crossdressers experience. They can rationalize that someone else is making them do it. That way, they are simply being good partners by complying with another person’s wishes.

These are merely possibilities that occurred to me as I contemplated the subject. I really don’t know the answers, but perhaps you have some thoughts to share.

I’ll Be Back

No, that’s not me getting caught in the picture at the top of the page. I had “the talk” with my wife long before we were married. The image was created by ChatGPT using a simple prompt.

As always, comments are welcome either here on the blog or by email at Jenn6nov at-sign gmail dot com.

JJ is always looking for more Stuff, so if there is something you would like to read about, please let me know!

Wearing Ann Taylor

Womanless beauty pageant contestant in Camdenton, Missouri, circa 1967