Happy Labor Day

Foxed

If you’re a Firefox user, you may have had trouble visiting Femulate lately. Depending on its security settings, Firefox may insist on an HTTPS connection, which Femulate currently lacks.

I remembered seeing an HTTPS option in my blog’s settings, so I sashayed over to investigate. Sure enough, there it was: “HTTPS availability.”

I clicked the gray button to enable it, expecting a simple fix.

Instead, Blogger informed me: “SAVE FAILED” and “You have not been authorized to use this domain. Please follow the settings instructions.”

I clicked RETRY, hoping Blogger might reconsider.

It did not.

I scratched my wig, trying to figure out what to do next.

Then I asked AI, which supplied a list of steps to solve the problem. With my painted fingers crossed, I started working through them.

Things broke down halfway through step two.

I decided to eat lunch.

Wearing Shein

Aleksandr Revva femulating in the Russian film Naughty Grandma.

Notes from the Fitting Room

Let me begin with a fact: I am a large person at 6 feet tall and 185 pounds.

My height, more than my weight, kept me closeted for a very long time. But when I finally began exploring my female persona in public, I discovered that my size was not a deal breaker.

Using changing rooms en femme was easy. Using them en homme was just as easy. I’ve lost count of how many times I tried on womenswear at Fashion Bug, Dress Barn, Fashion to Figure, Torrid and Macy’s during my lunch hour, all while disguised as a male.

I can recall only one “negative” experience. Years ago, while shopping for a girdle en homme at JCPenney, I asked to try it on. The saleswoman insisted that I use the men’s changing room. It was hardly a big deal, but it’s the only changing-room experience I can recall that had even a hint of negativity.

My dearly departed local Dress Barn stores had changing rooms scattered around the perimeter of the sales floor, as well as a changing area in the back. During my first few visits en homme, the staff directed me to the rooms in the back.

As I became a regular customer and the sales staff learned both my male and en femme names, I was invited to use the changing rooms along the sales floor.

That was especially delightful when I was en femme. I could step out and admire whatever I was trying on in the full-length, three-way mirrors outside the changing rooms. Doing so also invited comments from the sales staff and even other customers.

The sales staff usually liked what I was wearing—although the prospect of making a sale might have had something to do with that. But when a stranger liked what I was wearing, it was a home run.

And home was where I went, new dress in hand.

And so it goes.

Wearing Boston Proper

Brian Jones

The future is female on daytime television, too.

A Little Encouragement Goes a Long Way

Imagine a husband and wife browsing through a department store. He pauses beside a dress, admires the fabric, and starts to move along. She notices. “That color would look lovely on you,” she says. “Would you like to try it on?”

For a man who has quietly wondered what it would feel like to wear something feminine, that simple invitation could mean a great deal. Someone he loves has made room for a curiosity he may have struggled to put into words. Suddenly, a conversation that once seemed impossible can begin beside a rack of summer dresses.

Women who encourage their husbands or boyfriends to explore femininity can have all sorts of reasons. Some enjoy sharing an interest in clothes and beauty. Some find feminine men attractive. Others see how happy their partners become when they have the freedom to express themselves. There is room for affection, curiosity, and a little adventure in the same relationship.

The encouragement can be wonderfully ordinary. A wife might invite her husband to join her for a pedicure, help him choose a flattering blouse, or ask whether he would enjoy experimenting with makeup at home. The invitation gives him an opening. His answer sets the pace.

A sincere compliment can help, too. “That neckline suits you” or “You look happy in that outfit” offers something specific and kind. If he feels awkward, she can ask what would make him more comfortable. Perhaps he wants help with his lipstick. Perhaps he simply wants to sit beside her and discover that an evening together still feels like an evening together.

There can be plenty of fun along the way. Shopping becomes a shared expedition. Getting ready for dinner becomes an exchange of opinions about earrings, shoes, and whether a jacket works with a dress. He may discover that the question “Which handbag?” can require serious deliberation. She may discover that her husband has surprisingly definite opinions about necklines.

Of course, a supportive woman need not become a full-time stylist. He can learn to apply his own makeup, find clothes that fit, and develop his own taste. Buying a few things of his own also avoids the delicate conversation that begins, “Have you seen my favorite cardigan?” Borrowing still requires asking, even when two wardrobes suddenly have more in common.

Exploration can take many forms. One man may enjoy nail polish and a softer hairstyle. Another may love dresses, hosiery, heels, and the experience of presenting fully en femme. Someone else may discover that a single afternoon of experimentation satisfies his curiosity. There is no required destination, and a change in clothing does not dictate how someone must describe his identity or sexuality.

The most helpful encouragement leaves room for honest answers from both people. He should be able to say, “I would love to try that,” “I am nervous,” or “That is not for me.” She should have the same freedom to express enthusiasm, uncertainty, and preferences. Talking about spending, privacy, and what they would enjoy doing together helps keep the experience comfortable for both.

It also helps to keep expectations human. A dress cannot do the work of listening, sharing responsibilities, or treating a partner considerately. Those qualities deserve attention whatever either person is wearing. Feminine expression can add pleasure and discovery to a relationship while the everyday work of being good to one another continues.

Perhaps the loveliest possibility is the ease that comes with feeling welcome. A man who has been anxious about revealing this interest may find enormous comfort in being asked what he likes. His partner gets to know something more about him, and he gets to share a pleasure with someone whose company he already treasures.

For a couple who enjoy it, exploring his feminine side can become another part of their life together: a salon appointment, an afternoon shopping, a quiet evening trying something new. A little encouragement gives them somewhere to begin.

And occasionally, it gives her a perfectly reasonable excuse to say, “We should go shopping. You need shoes to go with that.”

Wearing Venus

Crossdressed husband and wife, circa 1930.

Stuff 131: Smile

By JJ Atwell

Pictures

It seems to me that a basic part of being a CD is the need to have pictures of ourselves. You know, if you don’t have hundreds of pictures of your femme self stashed away somewhere, you should turn in your CD card.

Well, perhaps that’s an exaggeration—not that I would stoop to such things just to keep you reading my musings.

The Woman in the Picture

It’s probably obvious that the first step in documenting your girl self is getting a good picture in the first place. The easiest way is to take one with your cell phone, perhaps using a mirror to capture your whole outfit.

The problem with mirror selfies is that the phone is visible and may block part of your outfit. You can remedy this by holding the phone off to one side, but that can be awkward and result in an unnatural pose.

Another issue is that you may capture surroundings you don’t want to share. For example, I took this picture in my bedroom using my iPhone and a full-length mirror. I like to have a picture of every outfit I wear when dressed. If nobody else is around to take it for me, I settle for a mirror selfie like the one you see here. It serves its purpose as documentation, but it isn’t visually interesting.

The Software

Fortunately, software can fix these issues. For example, I took this image in the mirror before one of our outings. The picture was taken in my bedroom, and I didn’t want that background in the final image, so I used ChatGPT to remove it, leaving only me in the picture.

Not bad, but perhaps it would be better without the phone in the frame. I asked ChatGPT to remove the phone and got this result. It looks pretty natural to me. Then I began wondering whether I could use a few more curves and a better pose.

Going Beyond

Playing with photo-editing software opens some new avenues for experimentation. How would you look if that top were cut a bit lower? What outfit might suit you better? All these things are possible with a program like ChatGPT, starting with the same image and a few simple prompts.

Here are some interesting suggestions, all created by ChatGPT. I love having these inspirations for future outings.

Please remember, though, that AI is no substitute for HI—human intelligence. Use your own judgment to decide what works best for you.

I’ll Be Back

The photo at the upper right of today’s Stuff is a stylized picture of me based on a real image from a GNO at Hamburger Mary’s. It was created using ChatGPT.

Comments are welcome either here on the blog or by email to Jenn6nov at-sign gmail dot com. JJ is always looking for more Stuff, so let me know what you would like to read about.

Wearing Paige

Jaloo femulating in the 2018 Brazilian film Paradise Lost.