Thursday, August 24, 2017

Let's Go Out

Going out for the first time is a very big step in the life of a femulator.

When I grew tired of the closet, I wanted to go out en femme, but I was very apprehensive. After years of practice in the closet, I thought my dress, hair and makeup were passable, but my size worried me.

I did go out en femme to Halloween parties about a half dozen times and those experiences should have given me confidence about my femulating abilities. In each case, I dressed in "office girl drag" and at three of those Halloween parties, strangers asked about me – they wanted to know, "Who is the woman not in costume?" Yet, I still shrank away from going out en femme because I thought my size would expose me as a faux female.

After about 20 years of femulating in the closet and out on Halloween, I joined a support group (Connecticut Outreach Society) that met 30 minutes away via the interstate. The group provided the option to dress at their meeting hall if desired, but I dressed at home and drove to the hall en femme. Perhaps, my Halloween experiences had emboldened me enough so that I did not fear driving en femme without the safety net of October 31.

I was a regular attendee of the support group's meetings and eventually was on their board of directors, edited their newsletter and organized their annual banquets. Today, I am their membership chairwoman, but I am getting ahead of myself.

In addition to the annual banquet, about once a year, my support group had an outing – usually to a restaurant where we were ensconced in a separate dining room so as not to scare the civilians. I did not cotton much to those arrangements, but it was better than nothing and it did give me an opportunity to mix with the civilian staff of the restaurant and any civilian customers that I might encounter entering or exiting the establishment. And being a rebellious sort, I always used the civilian restroom instead of the bathroom assigned to us girls in order to mix it up with the civilians.

In retrospect, those outings don't seem like much, but they were baby steps in the right direction.

Source: Bebe
Wearing Bebe (Source: Bebe)

Karl-Erik Taukar
Karl-Erik Taukar femulates Dana International on Estonian television's Your Face Sounds Familiar.


  1. Thank you very much for that post!
    In fact i have never been out en femme, except a few times in the night around my house or a some miles away at a big company parking lot...
    I so would love to be out in one of my classy dresses or an "normal" skirt and top, but i´m too afraid someone might read me and pointed with a shout: look, this man´s wearing a dress...

    Maybe, one day i would be as brave as you are...

  2. Julie M ShawAugust 24, 2017

    It took me a NUMBER of years to venture out, but now I kick myself for not going out earlier. Of course, it helps to have someone to go out with.

  3. Jenna Renee EvansAugust 25, 2017

    I too joined a group like that. Fairly regularly we would have a Girls Night Out. It was well attended and gave me my first taste of life outside the closet. I loved it and to this day enjoy going out en femme.


  4. This sound very familiar as like many girls this mirrors my first steps, maybe not so much out of the closet, as just making the closet bigger.