Tuesday, January 29, 2013

Killing Two Birds With One Dress


Today, I continue addressing the questions and suggestions you readers sent me in response to my call for topics that you would like me to write about or expand upon.

Peter Lappin of Male Pattern Boldness fame wrote, "Stana, you often describe your clothes shopping excursions and I'm wondering two things:

"1) Is the shopping more about being out and about in public en femme than it is about buying new clothes (since you could have dresses made and would have not of the challenges of finding dresses or coats with long enough sleeves)?

"2) Where would you most like to be able to go en femme other than shopping: e.g., work on a daily basis, on vacation (other than P-town), no place in particular?"

I seldom shop unless I am dressed en femme to do something else. For example, last week, my main reason for dressing en femme was to meet my editor for lunch and tour the facilities. Other times, I may be doing outreach or dining with friends.

Since I get out en femme less often than I 'd like, I try to kill two birds with one stone and take advantage of being able to try on clothes en femme rather than in boy mode or the often less than satisfactory shopping online.

If I could, I would dress en femme 24/7, that is, I would live as a woman the rest of my life. Since I cannot do that, I dress en femme whenever I can; almost anything I do that does not involve my family, I try to do en femme.

About the Photo

This is a trick that I learned from a genetic girl friend named Jodie: Take a photo of yourself trying on clothes to get a better idea of how the clothes look on you. Sometimes you might miss something if you just depend on how you see yourself in the mirror. In this case, I did not buy the tunic at Macy’s because when I looked at the photo, I realized it was not short enough!


  1. That tunic would make a perfect dress!

    I fully understand that family is hard to ditch but being a woman is heaven!

    1. I so regret not buying that tunic!

  2. Keep this topic going I am enjoying all of these conversations

  3. You are one smart cookie girl. I tried stuff on at Macys and did not have the pleasure of a second opinion. Now its iphone in the fitting rooms. Nice!

  4. To the thoughtful questions of Peter. 1.) Absolutely! One of he hardest balancing acts of most non full time transgender persons is having those moments to express our inner girl. To be seen in the image I present to the world that is my preferred image is not only enjoyable but a must. If only I could convey to the world that binary gender conformity is smoothing and stifling my, and others true personalities. "Shopping", dinning, movies, clubs et all are just excuses to get out and be seen. And they are it seems dynamic excuses for the most part. As for us who upon closure scrutiny would be recognize out of the normal. "Doing", is justified as it's hard to hit a moving target.

    2.) That place where women go with acceptance and normality everyday any place.