Friday, December 30, 2011

My Slip Is Showing

After reading your comments regarding Thursday's A Womanless Cornucopia, I realized that something was amiss.

For example, Tina wrote, "I know some folks that went to the Rocky Mount NC event last summer. They told me that I would have been horrified by the misogyny and transphobia that was on display, all in the name of good humor."

Joan B followed up with "As they are Tina's fears, they are mine. The hair and wig cap on the back of my always stands up when ever I see this kind of jest/humor/mockery? All in good fun and for the benefit of others makes these kinds of events a good thing. Unfortunately some of the guys have to make up for putting on a dress by acting out their perceptions of women, and it is ugly..."

Deborah added, "I did not find these understanding or respectful for transgendered persons. And the males looked awful! No real care was taken in their looks... unlike other womanless pageants down South."

Diane Loring wrote, "...guys in beards, really camping it up for laughs, is degrading and insensitive. It's kind of surprising that a southern Baptist church would sponsor it, unless it's just to make fun of transgendered people. I don't think they recognize gender identity issues. It's really making fun of us who have to deal with our crossdressing or gender identity. All in all, I don't think they help us..."

I took your comments to heart and deleted the links to the noxious ones.

I should have known better.

Unshaven and/or bearded womanless participants is a bad sign.

Womanless participants shaking their rears at the audience is another bad sign.

Participants fondling and squeezing their breasts or another participant's breasts is a very bad sign.

I do know better, but...

On vacation this week, I have been busier than if I had gone to work. As a result, my blogging time suffered.

Thursday night, I was under the gun to post something, so I grabbed a bunch of recently received womanless links and posted them leaving you readers to separate the wheat from the chaffe.

I will not do that again and I apologize to anyone who was offended by the post.

From now on, I will  be very selective regarding womanless posts.

Classy events like the Miss Eng'g pageant will get a pass, but events like a "Dude Looks Like A Lady" pageant at the local (you fill in the blank with a men's social club) will get a very discriminating look.

And so it goes!


  1. I get the point--but it's definitely a dose of reality to see what the haters are really up to. Abby Connelly

  2. Haters they are. Kepp yor friends close but your enemies closer.

  3. I'm not so sure that I would make the leap to identify them as "haters". Insensitive, sure. But perhaps that these events are held at all might be considered a good sign. After all if they truly were haters they wouldn't have been held. Now since many of them had no hope of looking anywhere near androgynous I'm sure that's why they acted so campy. Even some of the audience were feeling uncomfortable.


  4. which link had this person in it?
    I dont care what anyone say. This one is hot.

  5. Anonymous --- The link to that set of photos was one I did not delete; it is the last/third link in the list.

  6. I'm of two minds here... I appreciate the concerns expressed about the guys with beards - what are they 'thinking' ? - and their goofiness and I think they are so far removed they fail to sense their insensitivity - pity their female partners. On the other hand there is no point pretending that truly ugly pantomime doesn't exist. Buried in one of those collections of pictures was a younger male who really seemed into it... black dress, fishnets and apparently shaven legs... looked very good. I actually think some of those guys with the facial hair are simply compensating for some basic insecurity of their own. They are concerned, regardless of how much they'd like to express their inner feminine ego, to do so because of societal pressures in their very narrow out-looking part of the world. Life is neither all good, or all bad, it just is ! Thanks Stana for this incredible web-site.

  7. Stana, if it hasn't been mentioned since, it wasn't your hard and ambitious work, or the thinks, or the womanless pageant that was the source of our dismay/disappointment. I was directing my feelings for those pageant participants that really don't respect women by the actions they display in portraying one. I do love those participant and make up artists that go all out with reality based fashion and looks. It's those that I have hope in garnering empathy for the T community from what I believe is a very concerned society. Unfortunately with the good comes the bad. And it is only the bad that I critique. Thanks for all you do

  8. Anomymous, You do touch on a very valid point. The camp, the jest, the humor just could be a nervous mans perspective of what society would think of him should he really enjoy all the dress up! It's a step society is learning an taking baby steps in admitting. As for haters, there are some in this world, no doubt. But I don't think any of the links posted where from or by anyone with hate on their minds, just nervous laughter.

  9. Stana, You are a light in this sometimes very dark world. I would hope that you would never feel that you have to post something for your adoring fans. Your blog provides information and support to many of us. We miss you when you are gone, but realize at the same time that you have a life to live outside writing this blog. I applaud your decision to be very selective in the future, but as part of your informing us about what is going on we should be able to take the bad with the good. For my part if you are feeling pressed to get something on the blog for us to read - relax and do your best, but don't mess yourself up over it. We can wait for you. Colleen

  10. I think that all above have provided good comments. I like the updates of womanless events. Part of me harbors a wish that some such event would come to my town to give me a chance to dress up and mingle with the civilian populations.

    I would just note that we who do read you blog do have a degree of freedom and with the click of the mouse we can skip over content that we choose not to spend time on. When I went through the original posting there were some events that I took one quick look at and clicked to the next.
    I do like my freedom and liberty.

  11. It is said "discretion is the better part of valor" ergo, discriminating has to be a close second!

    I'm still reading what you write!

    PS, Happy belated New Year! I hope you get it all according to your wishes!