Monday, January 17, 2022

All of Me

I appreciate all the thoughtful comments that you readers sent responding to my Unfathomable post on Thursday. They gave me a lot to think about.

If you have been following the blog for awhile, you may recall that my many Halloween workdays en femme outed myself to my co-workers. At the time, I was clueless about my self-outing, although I assumed that some of my co-workers figured me to be trans something or other. Yet, no one ever questioned me about it. It was just common knowledge that I crossdressed (convincingly) on Halloween and whatever will be, will be.

After I retired, I was invited back for the company Christmas party. When I showed up en femme, no one blinked twice and m co-workers treated me as they had always treated me because no matter how I dressed, I was the same person.

Dressing en femme always was a better fit. My speech and mannerisms were always decidedly feminine (without even trying). My thoughts were usually on the feminine side of the street and I outright rejected things I found ill-fitting or downright appalling on the masculine side of the street.

I always felt more comfortable socializing with women. Although, I also socialized with men, and have had many male friends over the years, I always hesitated socializing with males because in the past, males abused and bullied me due to my feminine nature. (With friends like that, who needs... ?)

And there were too many female hormones and the resulting gynecomastia, but I was never tested for either, so who knows? But there is no question that I have always had female-like breasts (just more ammo for the macho mob). 

Finally, regarding sexy time, I was attracted to women, never men (although many men found the en femme me attracted).

So, what does that make me?

A woman, transvestite, female impersonator, transsexual, lady, femulator, girly man, crossdresser, etc.

Labels be damned. I am who I am, that is, uniquely me (just as you are uniquely you).

And so it goes.

Source: Venus
Wearing Venus

Virginia, wearing a vintage dress, wrote, “ Congratulations to you who enchants my reading every day with your duper blog for the morale of femulators like mw, who don’t dare to go out in the street. 


    Just live and enjoy yourself as best you can
    This loyal reader appreciates you being you.
    Labels dont help, however, I do like the term 'femulator'.
    If one is having issues with self shame and self loathing, deal with THAT FIRST. In spite of the initial anxiety, find a local support TG/CD support group OR at least find someone from the group to talk/test.

  2. For most of us that is the essence of what we have been through, working who we are, and how to express that to the world. In my own case I found it all very confusing, not least because I was always attracted to women (in the sixties we didn't understand sexuality much), I was not particularly feminine or attracted to archetypical feminine things or activities. I had no desire to play with dolls, I enjoyed playing Rugby, I still enjoy drink my beer in pints, and had both female and male friends. ~ yet......

    Sometimes I think the hardest thing to be in modern life is honest, to yourself and about yourself.

  3. Well said, Sweetie. I always prefer to follow the advice of that great philosopher (who turns 93 today) ---
    "I yam what I yam and that's all what I yam." - Popeye
    Stay Safe And Pretty, Sweetie.

    1. Beat me to it, Hon' I told my kids, "Be who you are, not what other people tell you that you are". Then I quoted Popeye. Always the right advice. I didn't know today was his birthday -- I'll eat some spinach to honor his memory today.

  4. Hopefully society will evolve past all of this!

  5. Yeah, labels be damned. Love yourself. Be who you are, guilt and shame free.

  6. So many have to put everybody in a certain box and label us something. Just stamp a bar code on my behind and be done with it. It’s all so exhausting. We are what we are. Stana and the rest of you have the right attitude. Love ya

  7. Thank you for 'nailing' it. I am so tired of labels. We are who we are, and if we deny it we will never be happy! I just wish it hadn't taken me so long to realize it!

  8. As Steve Lawrence and Sammy Davis Jr. sang, "I've gotta be me"! That is the only "label" anyone should have.

  9. There is only one label worth having -- woman. If questioned by others, quote Stana: "Boy by birth, woman by life!"

  10. Virginia, what a wonderful dress you are wearing. You presentation is really good. You really should go out, although perhaps in an outfit that is a little less amazing.
    Best Wishes,

  11. Stana, the standard of the femulators in your femulator slot is really very high. Very well done to all these ladies, and once again thank you to you for providing our online home.
    Best Wishes,
    Penny from Edinburgh.

  12. Stana -

    You have the right attitude!

    You go girl!


  13. Derar Stana ,
    You said -" uniquely me (just as you are uniquely you) " this is so true ! We all have different femulating needs and desires .

    1. Yes , I can be very happy in my steel toed work boots sparking up some steel and I also Need to feel myself Truly Oftentimes wearing a nice dress , leggings , comfortable heels and a nice wig and passing .

  14. Just wanted to add one more "Yea" vote to all of the above. Stana, your post captures so much of what I (and I'm sure others) feel. We are individuals, and no two of us are alike (other than identical twins??) When I am out and about (a lot of the time! ;-) ), whether I'm treated as another female, a guy who dresses decently in female attire or something else, I'm me. And oh yes Happy Birthday Popeye!