Saturday, June 3, 2017

Girls' Night Out


As I wrote in my previous post, my former manager (X) had promised to take me out to dinner to celebrate my retirement. She also invited another former manager of mine (Y), as well as one of the guys (Chuck) who I have worked with for 20 years. 

I had originally planned to attend the dinner as Stana (both my managers know I am trans), but when I learned that Chuck was joining us, I began reconsidering my en femme plans. Chuck did not know I was trans, although he might have suspected after having seen me en femme at work on Halloween.

With a lot of encouragement from Femulate readers, I finally decided to "damn the torpedoes" and stuck to my original plans to go to dinner en femme.

We had a dinner reservation for 5:30 PM, so I got ready and left for the restaurant at 5 because the Maps app claimed that the restaurant was 20 minutes away. Just as I was ready to go, I received an email from Chuck saying he would not be able to attend the dinner, so we were back to a girls' only night out. This was kind of a letdown because now I was prepared to dine with Chuck and introduce him to Stana. C'est la vie.

I arrived at the restaurant in 20 minutes, parked the car and went inside. I was the first to arrive and was seated at our reserved table in the bar. I ordered a drink and waited for the girls to arrive. 

About 15 minutes later, I saw them enter at the opposite end of the bar and I could see that they were looking around the room trying to find me. As they got closer, I waved and caught their attention. When they recognized who was waving, they both squealed with delight and were so happy to see me presenting as a woman. Any doubts that this was the right thing to do flew out the window.

They both complimented my presentation and admitted that if I had not waved, they would never had found me.

Y asked me if I would have presented as a woman if Chuck had not cancelled. It was kind of a silly question because we only received the news of Chuck's cancellation about an hour before our dinner reservation and there is no way I can switch from boy to presentable girl mode that quickly. As soon as Y asked the question, she realized it was a silly question and gave me a lot of credit for my willingness to meet Chuck as a woman. 

Both of my managers were absolutely wonderful and treated me like another girl and not a guy in a dress. They worked hard to get the pronouns correct and got used to calling me "Stana." There was some trans-related conversation, but it was mostly girl talk about work, marriage, fashion and even sex! 

The food and drink were excellent, but secondary to the evening. The evening was so affirming and a dream come true! I asked them if we could do it again and they both agreed that they would enjoy dining with me again.

The evening ended too quickly and after two hours, we exited to the parking lot where we said our goodbyes. They both hugged me, but as Y hugged me, she planted a real kiss (not an air kiss) on my cheek! 

It was a wonderful evening and I did not want it to end, so when I got home, I even walked the dogs en femme in broad daylight.




Street style, New York City
Street style, New York City




Alec Mapa
Alec Mapa femulating in the 1998 film Playing by Heart.

22 comments:

  1. Just a crazy idea... maybe they invited Chuck for a REASON? Maybe Chuck has a secret side too, so they wanted him to meet you. Maybe Charlene backed out at the last minute due to nerves. I know you have transdar, but maybe she flew under the radar - but one of the girls knew, so they wanted her to meet you before you left.

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    1. Thanks for your thoughts, Fiona, but the big hole in your theory is that no one knew I would be coming as a woman.

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    2. Really what are the chances of having a transgender co-worker....

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    3. A lot better than anyone would have thought a few years ago! There are a lot of girls (and boys) hiding away and no one knows.... we are just learning now how many there are!

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  2. Congratulation - Thanks for sharing your evening and I am so happy you did it. Escape sometimes come in big steps. Now on to the next chapter. What to do next?

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    1. Thanks, Rhonda. What to do next is at the top of my to-do list!

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  3. AnonymousJune 03, 2017

    I loved your last sentence!
    Patty O

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  4. Dear Stana,

    Like the title of a very popular old British sitcom ... ABSOLUTELY FABULOUS!!! I'm so happy for you!

    Love,

    Sheila.

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  5. It all paid off wonderful!

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  6. Now if Chuck showed up en femme, that would have been icing on the cake.

    John

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    1. I would have been very surprised!

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  7. Well done for 'having the balls' to meet them(possibly Chuck also) en femme. You had the added bonus of being treated as one of the girls to an evening of women's talk, Chuck's being there would have inhibited that. As you say it was so affirming and they are happy to repeat on another occasion, no doubt you feel it can't be soon enough. Have a happy retirement, you 'll soon wonder how you had the time to go to work

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    1. Chuck's presence would have certainly changed the conversation.

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  8. So glad it went well and thanks for sharing! I've been to dinner with several of my GF co-workers (most don't now I'm trans) it and was special each time. Isn't it great just to be one of the gals?

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    1. AnonymousJune 05, 2017

      It's worth paying the price for all those years of self-doubt, low self esteem and guilt to be accepted by women and being just one of the girls. There's nothing quite like it.

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  9. Stana what a wonderful night your outfit was so well put together and that smile and the brightness in your eyes project joy and love.

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    1. I was a very happy girl!

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