Friday, August 6, 2021

Fashion Model Stana

Readers commented favorably on the (Out and) About sidebar photo of “Fashion Model Stana,” so here is an excerpt from my book
Fantasia Fair Diaries describing what happened on the occasion of that photograph. 

On Tuesday of Fantasia Fair week...

I attended a practice session for the fashion show. Yes, I am modeling in the annual Fantasia Fair Fashion Show before an audience of civilians and trans-people alike and it should be the thrill of my lifetime (up to now). The girls running the fashion show walked us through the routine of walking down the catwalk, etc. The first step from the stage to the catwalk is a doozy, so I plan to take it slow in my killer heels! The fashion show is Wednesday night and it should be a lot of fun!

On Wednesday of Fantasia Fair week...

I returned to my room and relaxed for an hour, then went to fashion show practice with my highest high heels in tow. (We were supposed to bring the highest heels we planned to wear for the show to the practice.) I had not worn these shoes before (the silver sequins platform sandals from Payless) and I was surprised how comfortable they were.

Everyone took a turn or two walking on stage and down the catwalk. After practice, I returned to my room to get ready for the show.

We were told to apply our makeup on the heavy side because the stage lights would wash out our faces if all we had on was a normal application of makeup. So I used black and dark grays to do my eyes, bright reds for my lips, and heavy on the blush.

After making up my face, I left my hotel room and walked downstairs to the site of the fashion show (the fashion show venue was in my hotel).

The dressing room for the fashion show models was not a dressing room per se; it was actually the room used for the Fair’s keynote addresses and other presentations. As a result, the facilities were not very good for dressing. We had to drape our stuff over the chairs in the room.

Later, a clothing rack showed up, but by then, my stuff was in such a disarray that the arrival of the rack did not matter.

I wore the first outfit I planned to model to the show, so I was ready to go while other models were dressing.

A photographer working on The Gender Photo Project had a portable studio set up in the dressing room near where I had plopped my stuff. The photographer asked me if I wanted to pose for a photo for the project and of course, I agreed. 

During the photoshoot, the photographer mentioned that I resemble Norway’s most famous crossdresser, Esben “Esther Pirelli” Benestad. I never heard of Benestad, but I was familiar with a film she appeared in: Alt om min far (All About My Father), which is a true story about a transvestite, who seeks his son’s acceptance.

Nigel Dickson had his photography equipment set up at the opposite end of the room. Nigel is the photographer working on a Fantasia Fair book and it turns out that he has taken photos of many famous people.

While I was still enjoying the afterglow from my first photoshoot, Nigel came over and asked me if I would pose for him. I joked with some of the other models saying, “I’m ready for my close-up, Mr. DeMille.”

Turns out I was the first subject that Nigel photographed! After he took a few shots, he thanked me and promised to e-mail me a copy of the photo later.

The actual fashion show was now becoming an afterthought!

I was the fifth model of 23 models to go up the catwalk and I was on and off the stage very quickly. With floodlights shining in my face, loud music blaring, and the MCs making comments, the experience became a blur, but I do remember one of the MCs asking me if I was now ready for a New York City catwalk. I responded, “You betcha” in my best Alaskan accent and I got a big laugh from the audience.

Speaking of the audience, it was not a full house. I assume the lousy weather (cold and raining) kept down the crowd, but the audience that did show up was very enthusiastic and cheered each model loudly.

Wearing the black velvet evening gown from my friend Patty Marino’s collection, second time up was the same as the first... a blur, but the MC asked me to walk the walk twice (something they only asked a few models to do), so I must have been doing something right.

There was a party after the fashion show, but the weather was so miserable, I did not want to walk to the party venue, so I skipped it and went to bed.

From the Health Dept.

Wednesday, I saw my surgeon for a followup to my inguinal hernia repair surgery. 

The doctor confirmed my suspicion that my sore throat was caused by the anesthetic tube put down my throat during surgery and that it would heal itself quickly. He recommended lozenges to ease any discomfort.

He also said I was good to go and can start lifting handbags greater than 50 pounds!

Source: Le Redoute
Wearing Le Redoute

During my recovery from surgery, I watched some films and one that I found very interesting (not to mention,a little weird) was a 2019 British film titled Into the Mirror. It stars Jamie Bacon, who is femulating in the above photo from the film. I highly recommend the film to Femulate readers. It is only an hour long and you can view it for free on YouTube.


  1. Wow, you look fab. Your best ever!

  2. If you're interested, there's an interview with the cast:

  3. Thanks for posting "Into the Mirror". Heavy psychological undercurrents, but true to the journey we travel.

  4. They always like the tall girls as models...

  5. What a rare and wonderful experience, and you look the perfect model!

  6. "Into the Mirror" is quite a find. A very well produced and cast film (co-written by the main actors, it seems). I imagine many of us can associate with (at least the first part). I've often in the past glanced with envious eyes at women on tube trains applying makeup, as depicted near the start of the film, and at a younger age, can well associate with the period of confusion that Daniel struggles with throughout much of the film. I would like to have discovered how his relationship with Blu developed, but that clearly wasn't a key theme for the film.