Wednesday, December 16, 2020

I Never was a Man

Velma kindly sent me an article, Until I Was a Man, I Had No Idea How Good Men Had It at Work, written by a transman about how he was treated at work as a cisgender female, compared to how he is now treated as a man. In two words, “no comparison.”

As a male who oozed femininity, I did not experience the male privileges that my male co-workers experienced. As a feminine being, I was treated more like my female co-workers. 

All my life, I was a feminine being and growing up, I suffered the slings and arrows of my bullies for being so. At least in the workplace, the bullies had to constrain their mistreatment to some degree, so work offered relief from the nonsense that this feminine boy suffered out among the civilians, as long as I did not mind forfeiting male privilege and just be like one of the girls. 

It is no wonder that presenting as a woman was a perfect match for me. 

And so it goes.

Wearing ModCloth
Wearing ModCloth

Stefania Visconti
Stefania Visconti


  1. VELMA ON LEADERSIPDecember 16, 2020

    You know, I bet I sent that link to you much not more than an hour ago....

    Besides the link, I was going to question along the exact same lines YESTERDAY on the question form of your blog--but I then backed out, and pressed the backspace key...
    In spite of your honest self observations disclosing your own psyche,
    you, friend, have all the hallmarks of the 'natural leader'. Have you ever done the Meyers-Briggs Personality Inventory?
    Not just with this endeavor, but your OTHER site on SWL-ing as well as your contributions to the Amateur Radio society. I would assume there are other examples of such leadership in your life which do not show in your public blogs.
    Regardless your Meyers-Briggs, you do fill a HUGE Vacuum in this, our discrete society. That is leadership. In spite of your perceived femininity, you are indeed a leader. One of OUR leaders...
    I dont know how you stacked-up as leader or counsel in your working career, but you do a damn fine job here.
    Too many leaders are all image and no substance, (just look at DJT)and yet, he has followers aplenty, blindly heading toward the cliff. And most his followers say he is some sort of manifestation of 'machismo'(?).
    How does an elderly, obese, narcissistic, lying, cheating, draft dodging, bone-spurs faking coward rate 'macho leader'?
    And why should 'macho' count so highly among leadership selection? (I have speculated on Freuds discourse on subconscious 'latent homosexuality').

    In short, 'natural leaders', well, naturally rise to leadership positions.

    Thanks for being here.

  2. Most of the males I worked with treated as a guy, even though not much in common...The ladies, I found out later always thought I was just one of the girls,,a nice thing to be,,,,Trina


  4. I often saw others in the workplace aggressively going after raises and promotions. I could never bring myself to doing that, and my career advancement was probably less than it could have been had I pursued it. More recently I read that much of the disparity in pay between men and women, is because men are aggressive in going after pay raises and women are not. Perhaps being a woman worked against me, even though I was presenting as a man at work.

  5. The silhouette of the skirt of that Modcloth outfit reminds me of Christian Dior's 'New Look' of 1947. The red is so rich it looks positively royal. And the model is a looker too.
    Penny from Edinburgh.