Different Strokes for Different Folks

Here is one of the first photos ever taken of
 me fully en femme after my first makeover.

By Tami

I am a new contributor to Femulate. Hopefully my debut won’t be my last appearance here. 

I selected my femme, Tami, because it is very feminine and could never be mistaken for a male name. The feminine version of my male name is basically the same, hence not distinctly feminine.

In many ways, I am very similar to our hostess, Stana, but in some ways we approach crossdressing from perhaps a slightly different origin and perspective. Many of us girls relate very closely to her, while others share some or all of my traits. Variety is the spice of life, right? I know we all differ slightly, but the one thing that binds us tighter than the tightest corset is a love of the finer aspects of femininity, especially an appreciation of the soft, sensuous clothing that is currently worn primarily by the fairer gender.

Stana and I are both tall gals. I am also six feet two inches (188 CM) tall in my stockinged feet. Like Stana, my height doesn’t stop me from wearing the highest heels I can find. My male size 11 feet limit the variety of ladies size 13 heels available, but they are out there. I have had little success finding feminine shoes in my size in brick and mortar stores, as even the stores that have larger sizes seem to top out at size 12, which are just a tad too small, although slingbacks sometimes can fit. If the real world stores do have anything larger then 12 the selection is very limited and the styles are usually not feminine enough for this girly-girl. Such a pity, as I would welcome the chance to try on as many pretty shoes as possible, and model them in the stores to make sure they don’t hurt too much or don’t look as gorgeous as I hoped they would look. 

For you girls who are also challenged finding pretty feminine shoes in sizes 13 and up, there are plenty of good options online. Try Amazon.com; they have a very nice selection, as well as Sexy Shoes (https://www.sexyshoes.com), Pleaser (https://pleasershoes.com) and OnlyMaker (https://www.onlymaker.com). Ebay and Etsy usually have pretty shoes in the larger sizes. If you don’t mind waiting for delivery or risking getting poorer quality (it is hit or miss), there is always Temu (https://www.temu.com) and Shein (https://us.shein.com). They have a wide selection of all sorts of the most feminine finery, from shoes to lingerie to slinky girly outfits, so it is worth checking them out, too.

Stana and I are very near the same age. I am astonished that I am now in my mid 70’s (a lady never reveals her real age), although I don’t feel that old and I wonder where the years went. I have been told I look much younger, especially when I am all dolled up en femme. Thank the Goddess for makeup, wigs and shapewear! The good part of aging is having many experiences dressing as a girl behind me, which I will start sharing here whenever possible.

I started trying on women’s clothing at a very young age, same as Stana. It was easy for both of us because we had a mother and sister, in my case, three older sisters. I feel for you girls who didn’t have the opportunity to sample the outfits of a female relative. Stana and I both grew up in the same 1950’s period, when female clothing was generally much more feminine than it is by the standards of today. My mother and sisters always wore stockings, girdles or garter belts, silky slips and panties and bras and higher heels when they went out someplace special. They always dressed up on Sunday mornings for church. 

All girls back then wore skirts or dresses to school and they always wore stockings that were held up by girdles or garter belts. Pantyhose did not exist at that time; it was invented in 1959, but didn’t become popular until the mid 1960’s, thanks to the advent of the miniskirt, which made stockings held up by garter belts and girdles impractical. The shorter the hemline, the more likely your stocking tops and garters would show, especially when sitting down. As every dress wearer knows, when you sit in a dress or skirt, your hemline rises and more of your leg is on display.



Lastly in the similarity department, Stana and I are both from the Northeast USA. She is from Connecticut, and I am from nearby Long Island, New York, in the suburbs of New York City. That said, we have never met, but maybe someday we might have a girls day out for lunch or shopping. One can dream, right?

So what is different about us? Stana has stated that she has always been a feminine soul, that her mannerisms and affectations have naturally been more feminine than masculine. She was one of those who were more female than male as far at their persona goes, In that way, she takes to dressing en femme perfectly, as if the female wardrobe was always better suited to her style. She has written that when en femme people assume she’s a female, as much based on her mannerisms as her female clothing. Based on what I have read here over many, many years, she does not give one the sense that she is different than any other woman, except that she is taller then the average girl.

Unlike Stana, I do not come to being feminine naturally, I have to follow RuPaul’s advice, and “work it, girl!” I played sports all my life. I have a very male physique. I followed boys pursuits, rough-housing around, playing soldier and cowboys and Indians (I never played the cowgirl), and building model cars and airplanes, and collecting baseball cards and toy guns. I never played with dolls or wanted to be a girl. I never dressed as a girl on Halloween, but don’t think I wouldn’t have loved to if I’d only been brave enough! I remember reading here that Stana also enjoyed many of the same young male interests of that time also. And just like her, I was and still am only attracted to females. 

I don’t feel I was born in the wrong body. So why do I crossdress? I crave the sensual quality of femininity, the silky feel of nylons on my freshly shaved legs, the soft caress of silk or satin panties, slips, blouses, skirts and dresses, the head-turning scent of a flowery perfume. I get shivers from donning a tight girdle or corset and feeling the constriction that helps me get a more feminine silhouette. 

I always wear stockings, not pantyhose, as I adore the feeling from the tug on the garters on my sheer silky stockings as I walk. I would often wear them under my male clothing, just because of the thrill the feeling they gave me. For me, it’s not about feeling more “natural” when dressed en femme. It’s about the feeling of the clothes, the excitement, the adventure, the thrill, achieving an indefinable feeling that borders on euphoria. 

How I started this lifelong close relationship with the female wardrobe and how it evolved and flourished will be revealed in upcoming posts. Lace up your corsets tight, girls, it’s going to be a bumpy ride, just like the bumps created by my garter tabs when I wear my tightest skirt.

Wearing Carolina Herrera

Roland Drew femulating in the 1942 film Lady Gangster.