Friday, December 16, 2022

Girl’s Day Out

I retired in the summer of 2017, but the folks at my old salt mine invited me back for the company’s Christmas party luncheon. After five consecutive appearances en femme at work on Halloween, I assumed some of my co-workers figured that I was gender variant, so I decided to attend the luncheon en femme and confirm any thoughts that my co-workers had concerning my gender. So hop on the wayback machine and read the post I wrote all about that day five years ago .   

Tuesday, this girl went out for the day.

After I did my face and my hair and slipped into my undies, I had second thoughts about the outfit I had put together on Monday and began formulating Plan B.

Hanging in my closet was a hunter green lace dress that I wore to my support group’s Christmas party about 25 years ago. It was dressy, not over the top and very suitable for an office Christmas luncheon. I slipped it on and discovered that the lining was falling apart (strike one), the zipper was not working properly (strike two) and it looked like an old dress (strike three). I literally threw it away and went back to Plan A.

After I put on “the outfit,” I realized it would have been a mistake if I had not worn it. It made me feel like a million bucks and a few years younger.

The weather was unseasonably warm (in the low 50’s), so I was able to wear my blue trench coat instead of a heavy winter coat. Perfect – because the trench coat grazed my knees. Although I was very comfortable wearing “the outfit” to the luncheon, I was less comfortable wearing it around the mall and my trench coat would hide “the outfit” while I went shopping before the luncheon.

First stop was the nail salon in the Waterbury mall to buy a gift certificate for my daughter. In the past, I avoided that mall, as well as all the other stores in Waterbury because I spent the first half of my life in Waterbury and I did not want to run into anyone I knew from my male life.

I realize that even if I did run into an acquaintance, they probably would not recognize me, but they might recognize my wheels. My license plate displays my ham radio callsign, so anyone who knows my call (most of my family and friends) might wonder who was the blond driving my car.

But I don’t give a damn anymore. If I ran into an old friend or acquaintance, I would say “Hello” rather than run away. Then I  could cross another person off my Coming Out To Do List.

So I went to the mall, found the nail salon, purchased a gift certificate and no one batted an eye. And I did not run into an old friend or acquaintance.

I did not browse the mall because time was of the essence and I had two more stops to make before going to the luncheon.

I drove to Big Lots in Wallingford (the city where I was formerly employed and where the luncheon was being held) to purchase CD/DVD jewel cases. Big Lots has the best price for jewel cases (25 for $5) and since the store was on the way to the luncheon, I stopped by to stock up.

I picked up two packages of jewel cases and went to the cashier to pay up. The cashier was a 20-something fellow and I think he was flustered by my presence. Instead of spouting out the usual, “Were you able to find everything you wanted?,” he said something that I did not understand, so I asked, “What did you say?”

He replied, “I meant to say ‘Were you able to find everything you wanted?’”

I don’t know if he was flustered because I was a crossdresser or a ravishing beauty or a ravishing crossdresser. Whatever... I was amused as he settled down and handled the rest of the transaction in a professional and pleasant manner.

I have my car serviced at the dealer where I bought it in Wallingford. Whenever I have my car serviced, the dealer always gives me a coupon for a free car wash. So after Big Lots, I went to the car wash to use a coupon.

There is only a brief encounter with a human being (to turn in the coupon), so I did not expect any issues and there were none, although the human being I dealt with is the same guy who I have encountered during past car cleansing. Evidently, he did not recognize me, my car or my license plate.

It was now high noon. I was five minutes away from the luncheon location, so I would be fashionably late.

I arrived at the banquet hall, parked my car and as I walked to the entrance, I encountered Jackie, who was also on her way into the hall. I confessed to her that I was nervous and she said I had nothing to be nervous about, but that did not comfort me much.

I entered the hall and almost every seat was full and the contents of every full seat looked up as I removed my trench coat and revealed “the outfit.” There was a definite buzz in the air. Rick, the fellow who organized the luncheon greeted me and pointed out the empty seats that were available. I was always on very good terms with Rick, so I took the empty seat next to him at his table.

I was the only woman at that table, but I had worked with all the guys at the table for years. In fact, I worked with one fellow at two previous places of employment, so we have known each other for over 30 years. The other fellows were always supportive when I dressed en femme at work for Halloween, so I felt comfortable with the group. As I settled in, one of guys offered to buy me a drink (“A glass of pineau, please”). That never happened when I attended past Christmas luncheons en homme!

One hyphenated word described the luncheon: anti-climatic.

It was as if I showed up in boy mode. Except for Jackie, who said she loved my skirt, no one mentioned “the outfit” or the fact that I was presenting as a woman. Everyone called me “Stan” and socialized with me as they always had in the past.

I was seated at the first table in the room, so everyone had to pass by me to get to the bar and the food. About half the attendees greeted me in one way or another — waving, shaking my hand, giving me a hug, asking me how I like retirement, etc. Folks I have known for a long time stopped by and spent a longer time conversing with me.

A few co-workers confirmed my suspicion that they suspected I was transgender, so it is likely that most of my co-workers shared the same thought. I guess being transgender did not make a difference.

What a great bunch of people I worked with!

Source: New York & Company
Wearing New York & Company

Paula Goodwin
Sister blogger Paula Goodwin glammed up for her support group Christmas party.


  1. What a great story, glad it all went smoothly! Xx

  2. Gosh Stana
    I was with you every step of the way as you walked into that banquet hall.
    I was picturing myself greeting and meeting my colleagues as you were, this is something I really would like to do. I hope I get the chance, for full disclosure Femulate readers, Stana and I worked for the same corporation but in different cities. I would read her accounts of Halloween and say to myself “I wish I could work at a company like that!”
    We only found out that we were Femulate Sisters toward the end of Stana’s career, she would mention certain, terms or corporate events and they all to often matched up with things on my end.
    I knew Stana’s surname from her emails to me, so I went to the corporation directory and low and behold
    So I took a chance and sent an email off to this person whom I guessed was Stana
    Dear Stan
    We may have a mutual acquaintance do you know Paula Gaikowski ?
    BINGO! -----Paula G

  3. You do indeed look like a million bucks Stana. I would have loved to be in that banquet hall to watch the reactions as you took off your coat. And you're right, they do seem like a nice bunch of people.