Monday, June 7, 2010

dressing for work

100607 At work, the mode of dress is business casual. Women tend to wear slacks or pants, seldom skirts or dresses. Same goes for the men.

I am not ready to come out at work (I may never be ready to come out at work). However, I have been considering wearing women's clothing to work. No skirts or dresses, but rather women's slacks and tops that are androgynous or unisexual; items of clothing that look masculine enough that the casual observer will not notice that they are actually women's clothing.

I already own women's flats that are unisexual and when the weather turns cooler, I have women's sweaters that can go either way.

I am unsure about the unmentionables to wear. Women's socks are a given, but what about knee-highs? Spanx will definitely be part of my wardrobe, but what about sports bras (I can use the support) and camisoles?

I already wear moisturizer and eye cream on a daily basis; I can definitely see adding a lip balm to the mix.

Getting a unisexual hairdo is another option and I have also been thinking about getting my ears pierced.

I think if I slowly introduce these feminine items into my wardrobe, my co-workers will not notice that I am wearing women's clothing.

The important thing is that I will know that appropriately I am wearing women's clothing.


  1. I have had this subject on my mind for awhile now and have a few entries in my blog addressing similar items. I just started wearing women's trouser socks instead of men's crew socks. I find the trouser socks to be much more comfortable and I have just placed an order at JMS (Just My Size) for some support socks. I also have my eye on some women's dress slacks with built in tummy control. And yes, Spanx are a wonderful addition to my wardrobe also.

  2. reminds me of that episode of "the office" where Micheal accidentally cross dresses when he realizes the suit he found in the goodwill bin is actually a woman's suit.
    "Who makes it?"
    "umm.. mysterious.. and it is mysterious because the buttons are on the wrong side"

  3. BARBARA MILESJune 08, 2010


  4. Like Meg, I also generally wear fem underwear, socks, and shoes. For shoes, oxfords seem pretty unisex, though mostly I wear athletic shoes. Some loafer/slip-on styles will also work, but make sure you compare how much of the top of your foot shows in the women's version versus the men's. Many very similar loafers ended up showing quite a bit more foot in the girl version than I was comfortable with. For general clothing, some styles of women's jeans (the not-too-flared bootcuts) are easily assumed to be male when worn by someone otherwise presenting as male. Khakis and dockers-type pants also interchange easily. I've had less luck with ladies slacks in non-cotton materials because they tend to hug my figure more than a guy's pants would. As for the top half, no one's ever noticed that I wear women's polos or button-down cotton shirts. The lines of most sports bras will show through the back of your shirts, but if you wear a jacket or sweater, you'll be fine. I also have a bunch of women's tanks that I use as undershirts. As long as nothing is obviously feminine, it just boils down to an attitude thing. If you're acting "normal" for your male persona, then no one will give it a second thought. Good luck!

  5. Great post! I agree with you. My office is the same but I'm just not there yet to wear nylons and high heels every day.

    I have some androgynous looking plants and tops. I too have women's shoes that can pass either way.

    It's what I call 'My Annie Hall Look'. Works for me and hasn't raised many eyebrows or tempers and I've been doing it for almost 4 years now.

    But as you said the important thing is that I know.

  6. Hi. I just stumbed across your blog and find it very interesting. It's too bad that people are still so narrow-minded that they mistreat people who cross dress. Because of this, I see that you have to be so careful not to cross a line in the sand at work. Maybe someday it won't be accepted to discriminate against cross dressers, just like it is no longer accepted to be racially discriminatory. I work with a woman who had a sex change years ago, and I am witness to the constant derogatory comments that my other coworkers make about her (she is still quite masculine-looking). Anyway, best of luck to you, and I look forward to poking around your blog some more.

  7. Thank you all for your great advice. I have made a promise to myself that all my future clothing purchases will be from the woman's department and eventually, my boy wardrobe will be entirely composed of female attire.

  8. I used to do that at my former workplace before I began transitioning.