Femulate: Stuff #102: A Tale of Two Saturdays

Monday, December 29, 2025

Stuff #102: A Tale of Two Saturdays

It Was the Best of Times

By J.J. Atwell

You may recall the start of Charles Dickens novel A Tale of Two Cities about the French Revolution. The full quote is “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.” I was reminded of that quote as I sat down to write about two recent Saturday experiences. But be cheered, that other Saturday wasn’t actually a worst experience. Just a very different one. Both Saturdays involved going out to eat, one as JJ, the other as my guy self.

Getting Ready

In the past, I’ve observed that it takes women longer to get ready to go out than guys typically do. You’ve probably noted that as well. Did you ever think about how much time it takes you as a CD (substitute your preferred term) to get ready to go out to a nice restaurant? I have and the difference between guy mode and girl mode is striking.

When I go out in girl mode it takes about 2.5 hours to get ready. That’s timed from shower to packing my bag and heading out. I know that’s a long time, but there is so much to do.

Obviously starting out with a clean slate is important, so the shower and shave takes a bit more time. I know I have to shave my face twice plus having to pay attention to legs, arms and armpits. Then I need to cool off for a bit before getting into shapewear and starting my makeup. I still don’t have a good makeup routine, so I spend a lot of time trying different shades of foundation and blusher on my face. Not to mention working on the eyes, which is my big fail. Once done with that I can start to dress and figure out what jewelry best compliments the look. Add the shoes and the bag. Then it’s time to put on the wig and fuss with it to make it look best. Oh yes, and the press-on nails take me 5 to 10 minutes.

When I go out as my guy self it takes about 30 minutes from shower/shave to out the door. That might actually be overstating it. Basically, it’s just putting on a dress shirt and nicely pressed pants, along with shoes that are fairly dressy. Brush my hair so it’s tidy and perhaps a spritz of cologne. Make sure I’ve got my wallet and keys in my pockets. Not much more is needed.

Who Do We Dress For?

I have an ongoing correspondence with a GG follower of Stuff about the difference is how women approach getting dressed to go out and how men do. I regularly go out to some nice restaurants in guy mode. I try to up my game in the guy wardrobe department when I do that. But when sitting in the restaurant and looking around the room I’m amused by the difference in dress of some couples. What I often see is that the woman has taken pains to dress nicely, but the guy has perhaps thrown on a clean shirt. It makes you wonder if they even talked about where they were going ahead of time and if they were on the same page as to how nice the venue was.

That brings up the question of who women dress for. Do they dress to impress their male admirers? Or do they dress to impress other women? Both? Talking with my friend Gigi, it seems that grooming standards are significantly different between men and women. We speculated that women regularly get judged by other women. They recognize when a woman has taken the time to consider what to wear and how to accessorize. It seems that guys don’t typically noice those little things, unless you are wearing a hat of a favorite sports team.

Since women have so many more options when getting dressed they unfortunately have many more chances to get it “wrong.” Sometimes you wonder if a woman has a mirror in their house or a good friend who will say “you’re not wearing that.” Other times you see a woman who has it nailed. Everything just works. The outfit is approbate for their body, their hair and makeup is tasteful and their shoes and bag are all coordinated. But who notices it more, men or women? Or maybe a CD?

I’ll Be Back

As always comments are welcome either here on the blog or by email to Jenn6nov at-sign gmail dot com. JJ is always looking for more stuff so if there is something you would like to read about, please let me know.