Monday, January 16, 2023

That’s Not Me

Vladimir Luxuria
My heroines were transpeople who lived full time or part time as women and more importantly, did not hide their male roots, for example, people like Paul Whitehead, Grayson Perry, Miqqi GilbertVladimir Luxuria and Eddie Izzard among others. Most (all?) are no-surgery, no-hormone transpeople and are legally male (just like me).

They were my heroines because I thought it was very gutsy to be a male who was so open about his crossdressing. Closeted like I was, I could not imagine freely admitting to the civilian population that I was a male who crossdressed. But I always hoped that I could be like my heroines some day.

Revisiting my heroines, I realize now that I am like my heroines, that is, I live as a woman part time and don’t hide my male roots. I achieved heroine status and did not know it! And now that I achieved heroine status, I don’t think it is such a big deal.

The word “heroine” seems to be too strong a word for what I am. A heroine is “a woman admired or idealized for her courage, outstanding achievements, or noble qualities.” That’s not me. 

Some say that some of the things I have done are courageous. But I never felt I needed courage to do what I did. I was just trying to live my life in a way that was fitting for me (and damn the torpedoes).

Source: Rue La La
Wearing LoveShackFancy

Artyom Suchkov, Roman Popov and Dmitriy Vlaskin
Artyom Suchkov, Roman Popov and Dmitriy Vlaskin femulating in the 2019 Russian film Girls Are Different. You can view the film on YouTube.


  1. are a US.

  2. Hmmm.... some people are nervous and some are not. But once the realisation hits that you can present as a woman there is no force strong enough to stop you.

  3. Good post - You nailed it. That is me too. I live "MY" life and let other see what ever want. Authentic? Yes, the authentic person that I am!.

  4. Still, you need to be commended, even if you won't do it yourself. I'll do it for you. You're amazing! xx

  5. Stana you are amazing and this site is such a wonderful resource. Like you I am a no-surgery, no-hormone transwoman and are legally male. I live my two lives and be as authentic as I can be. Nothing beats being your authentic self!

  6. if not heroine, how about a role model? setting an example?

  7. Rachel McNeillJanuary 17, 2023

    Stana may eschew any heroine label out of modesty, but her scholarship is first-rate.

    Surfacing image after image and references galore about long-departed femulators and depictions of our long-deceased "sisters" is an invaluable resource to those of us who care about the history of the TG/CD community. And finding fresh content for near-daily postings for years and years requires incredible diligence.

  8. I get little peeved when cis people tell me how brave I am ~ I dot feel brave, I stayed closeted as long as I could in the end I just couldn't maintain dual persona, I have in to the inevitable. Sure I'm public, but as a musician it's hard not to be.

  9. There are photos of Vladimir that sure looks like she has breasts (and early photos of her flat chested). And looking at early and later photos I'm pretty sure she's had a nose job and maybe other facial surgery. Here's I photo I found searching "Vladimir Luxuria bikini"

    And here's one you used