Tuesday, May 27, 2014

Monica's Back!

One Person's Journey to Womanhood – Part 10


By Monica M 


I have said that, from an engineering perspective, we can break down the femulate problem into five components (how male is that!): one hardware and four software. Not having had any changes to my hardware (or hormones other than the, thankfully, a depletion of testosterone), I don't really feel qualified to deal with the hardware issue. However, from observation and experience I feel that “the vag is not the badge.” There are more fruitful avenues of approach to presenting as (and feeling oneself to be) a woman – namely, the software approach.

To my mind, the cake is the software and the icing is the hardware.

The software components are 1) voice, 2) deportment, 3) presentation, and 4) operating system. It is my intention to devote a blog post to each of these over the next couple of days so that I can share my experience and, hopefully, help others. Today I will start with voice.

Voice is probably the most important thing in passing. No, really, it is so important. Your voice will out you very quickly if it has a male quality to it no matter how good you look. On the other side of the coin, I have a theory that if The Terminator spoke with a believable female voice, at least 20% of the people would accept him as a female in disguise. To train the voice takes so much time and effort that people assume you really must be a female if you have a good female voice.

I started working on my voice in 2009 about six months before I went to Esprit. I am still working on my voice. I practice about 20 minutes most days to keep it in shape. I am still not happy with it. It takes a long time to get the voice you want – do not get discouraged – but when you get that voice, a whole new level of confidence opens up for you.

In my opinion, the queen of feminine voice training is Kathe Perez. She is a great teacher and a lovely all-around person. I had dinner with her twice last month, when I was in Denver. There are some photos of that event taken by my good friend A. But the photo of me is so unflattering (so male looking!) that I am not inclined to publish it.

Kathe produces CDs and does on-line training of your voice to produce a feminine sound and cadence. I have found her practices and advice extremely valuable. She is currently working on an app for mobile phones, which will accelerate the learning process. Spend some time with Kathe, you will not regret it.

Here is the link to her website. If you connect with her, tell her that Monica sent you! :)

In the meantime, every time you hear a woman talking on the TV or radio, quietly repeat what she is saying so that you get used to the melodic flow of the female voice.

Next up, deportment and movement.

(Part 9 of One Person’s Journey to Womanhood appeared here.)







Actor Brian Charles femulating on stage in Pop! (2010).





Source: Boston Proper

Wearing Boston Proper.

12 comments:

  1. Wow! What a creative way to approach the subject!!! Thanks Stana :)

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    1. You're welcome, Cyrsti, but I'm just the messenger!

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  2. Hi Monica
    I certainly agree with you that Kathe is the Best! Having lived in the Denver area I was fortunate to meet her at Gold Rush one year and many of us from the TSK chapter of TRI-ESS attended her sessions. We traveled together (read nothing else in to that, although we sorta kind went out a few times) and attended Esprit in 2002 (I think), so I was lucky to get some additional instruction for the value of my company. Kathe is indeed one of those women that we all would love to femulate ... vivacious, intelligent, attractive and personable I was always pleased to see and spend time with her. It's my hope that she will attend the next Keystone conference that I'm planning to attend. Thanks Monica for mentioning Kathe in your ongoing and excellent analysis of putting it all together!

    Jeanine

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    1. You are welcome Jeanine...

      Monica M

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  3. Sadly, the site you link to gives nothing but 404 errors after the main page. Something is broken on her site.

    Jillian

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    1. Try http://www.exceptionalvoice.com/

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    2. I did that, but every link on the main page leads to a 404 error. :(

      Jillian

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    3. Then try http://www.katheperez.com/

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  4. Why on earth does our human element need to be broken down to anything more then I am who I am. The elements in question are only the result of society looking at commonalities in gender sex relationships. A feminine boy is no different then a masculine girl. Both have their feet in the race to succeed. Each person on this earth has a degree of masculine or feminine. It is our culture and society that asks use to conform to the rigors of the majority that gave a clear perception of a gender sex congruity!

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    1. Hi Hollybnh,

      I guess it all depends on what you decide you want back from society. You are correct in your statement...but society is not going to change its views any time soon on the binary gender question. If you want to interact with them, you have to play by their rules!

      Monica M

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  5. Monica,

    I love this article. I love your insights. Thank you SO kindly for the kind words about the value you received with your voice training.

    Oh, and Jeanine!! Datti and I were just talking about you! How are you!!

    Much love,
    Kathe Perez
    www.exceptionalvoiceapp.com

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    1. Hi Kathe!
      How wonderful to hear from you .... I thought I felt my ears burning! Gina and I are well although the past several years have been a trial (my father passed away last month). We are living in N. Wisconsin and I get out in Duluth now and then, otherwise it's a quiet life up here in the Northwoods. I don't want to go on and on here on Stana's blog so email me when you get a chance so we can catch up! I hope you are well, happy and successful! ... and my regards to Datti. jeaninecw@ hotmail.com

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