Wednesday, May 26, 2021

How Do I Know

Samantha Riedel
I just read an excellent them. article by Samantha Riedel, which is “A guide to questions I asked myself when I began to wonder if I was transfeminine — and questions you may ask yourself, too.”

The article addresses questions that many of us have/had. Here are a couple of pertinent quotes from the article. 

“Clothing is as gendered as we want it to be, and as much as I love skirts and skater dresses, I've never stopped being comfortable in good old denim jeans and a dorky graphic tee. Anyone who tells you that you need to present a certain way for your gender to be valid has way weirder ideas about what constitutes gender than any trans person. If cis women get to be butch, so do us transfems. That's it, the end, have fun.

“There's no wrong way to be trans or nonbinary; if you feel like those words approximate what you're feeling, then run with it. The only person who gets to decide your gender, and what that means, is you.”

I highly recommend reading Samantha's article.

(Thank you, Velma, for the relay.)

Wearing Tina
Wearing Tina

A “wedding tableau” full of pretty femulators in Sydney, Australia, circa 1930
A “wedding tableau” full of pretty femulators in Sydney, Australia, circa 1930


  1. What a fascinating article. Thank you for the signal boost.

  2. AnonymousMay 26, 2021

    Dear Stana ,           There are probably many of us who love their transcendent transfeminine nature but prefer to present in public as males , but so need to privately , lovingly , slip into feminine dressing to often feel complete .

  3. AnonymousMay 27, 2021

    Thank you very much for surfacing this article. I really enjoyed reading it and a few others by the same author. It was very enlightening.

    I had never heard the phrase "transfeminine" before but I quite like it. I myself consider myself gender fluid, but transfeminine feels like it might also fit. It can be confusing, so finding words that fit how I truly feel makes a difference.

    I very much enjoy your blog for things like this! Thank you!