Tuesday, February 19, 2008

What would Staci do?

A few days ago, Meg sent the following e-mail:

"I'm going to go out (alone) for the second time tomorrow. I'm not sure I handle interactions with other people well. I assume they know that I'm just a 'Girl For A Day' and I say something to make sure that they know that I know that they know.
"But should I just assume that I pass perfectly and they don't notice that the voice doesn't match the outfit very well? I'm afraid that might make them uncomfortable about what to say (just in case I'm really a girl with a guy's voice, not a guy with a girl's wardrobe).
"What would Staci do?"

In the past when I went out, I waited for the people I interacted with to give me a clue that they knew I was a guy (because I wanted to know if I was passing successfully as a woman). If I did not get a clue, I often tried to give them a clue and sometimes I would just flat out say I was a guy.

Half the time, they were clueless and were surprised that I was a guy and not a gal.

The other half of the time, I was clueless and after I clued them in, I discovered that they already knew, but were accommodating me for one reason or another. Maybe they were being nice and respected my desire to be treated as a woman. If they were a salesperson, maybe they were patronizing me, i.e., they were trying to make a sale and did not want to lose the sale by acknowledging that they knew I was a guy.

After I realized this, I decided to go along with the flow and accept (and enjoy) the fact that I was being treated as a woman, for whatever reason. Hopefully, I passed, but if I did or did not pass, I sure did not want to out myself by intentionally giving them clues.

I admit that I am still curious and look for clues, but as they say, "Curiosity killed the cat," so I bite my tongue and try not to give myself away.


  1. Stacy, you do realize there are many schools that will train you how to walk , talk , and socialize as a lady. Some take you on shopping trips or lunch or whatever.

    Chana Rochel

  2. Yes, Chana, I am aware of such schools, but in my opinion, their services are too expensive.