My Robert Duvall Story

On Monday, my favorite contemporary actor, Robert Duvall, passed away. I wasn’t surprised; I knew he was getting on in years, but I was saddened nonetheless.

About 25 years ago, my family and I took the train into Manhattan to see The Nutcracker. After arriving at Grand Central, we grabbed a cab to Lincoln Center for the afternoon performance.

We had a few hours to spare before the ballet began and planned to eat lunch at Café Fiorello, just across the street from Lincoln Center. I had eaten there before and had always been very satisfied. Little did we know that day that the food would take a back seat to the live entertainment.

When we entered the restaurant, it was quiet; maybe two or three tables were occupied, which wasn’t surprising since it was still late morning. As we walked in, I noticed two men sitting together in a booth. One of them looked familiar.

We were seated at a nearby table, with me facing the booth. After studying the man for a minute or two, it hit me: it was Robert Duvall. I hadn’t recognized him immediately because he looked older than he usually did on screen; he was well into his seventies at the time.

Like me, my sister is a big movie fan, but she was sitting with her back to him. I said casually, “There’s a guy sitting behind you who looks like Robert Duvall,” knowing full well it actually was Duvall.

“Yeah, sure,” she shot back, assuming I was joking.

“Turn around and look,” I said. She did and once she realized it really was him, she completely lost it. I briefly considered asking the waiter for a seat belt to keep her in her chair.

Being a good sibling, I offered to switch seats so she could have a better view. She gladly accepted, spent the rest of the meal staring at Duvall and to this day, has no idea what she ate at Café Fiorello that day.

Wearing Boston Proper

Vitor Kley femulating Adele on Brazilian television.
Click here to view this femulation on YouTube.

Sebastian Muntean

Thursday’s Femulator slot featured Sebastian Muntean femulating Amy Winehouse on the Romanian version of Your Face Sounds Familiar. Mr. Muntean certainly looked the part, but it was his singing that truly stunned me. His voice was so authentically feminine it bordered on the unbelievable.

Impressed, I searched online for other femulations by Mr. Muntean and discovered two more – both every bit as remarkable as his Amy Winehouse performance.

In one, he femulates Beyoncé; in the other, he femulates Corina Chiriac. Click here to view the former and here to view the latter.

You won’t be disappointed.

Wearing Boston Proper

Sebastian Muntean femulating Beyoncé.

Stuff 109: Spending On Ourselves

By J.J. Atwell

Being A Woman Isn’t Cheap

Something that I’ve noticed over the years is that women spend a lot of money on themselves. For some things, it’s society that pushes them to spend more. There seems to be a pervasive thought that the more expensive a product is the more desirable. 

Think about the lowly handbag. They are available in price ranges from $30 to thousands. It seems like a lot of women are carrying around a Louis Vuitton bag these days. If you’re not aware, those things carry very large price tags. Not as large as a Hermes bag, but still quite something. 

I’m sure that some women splurge on things like that as a reward. They’ve accomplished something significant or just survived a particular challenge, and this is the reward. Not a bad idea really. Setting realistic, but stretch-goals for yourself and rewarding yourself when you achieve them can be a good strategy to push yourself. 

Back On Topic

In general, do you think women need more stuff? Think about cosmetics. A guy just needs some moisturizer and a comb for his hair. A woman needs an array of cosmetics just for her face. Yes, that’s something that us CDs know from experience. 

Women also tend to wear more jewelry everyday. Some things are simple like pearl stud earrings and a pendant. Other things move further up the scale in terms of price. A guy might spend money on a fancy watch, a ring and perhaps a bracelet. Women spend or get gifted, a lot of jewelry which they swap out depending on the occasion.

We know that women have a lot of societal pressure about how they look and act. It seems to me that this pressure is a major factor in the whole women’s fashion industry. I sometimes use the term “cheap” when talking about my femme stuff. I should probably say inexpensive instead. After all, it’s not easy being pretty, but it’s also not pretty being easy. 

Do You Spend A Lot?

I’m curious, as you accumulated your femme wardrobe and accessories did you spend a lot? How did you acquire your stuff? Did you shop in brick and mortar stores? Online shopping? Hand-me-downs? Thrifting? For me it’s a combination of all of those. 

My biggest spend on a single item, besides my breast forms or wig, is probably a dress for the beauty pageant my local group puts on. But even that was under $100. OK, so the breast forms were $300+ as was the wig. Those were my biggest spendings. But this is not a competition. Spending more doesn’t make you or me a winner. Nobody is keeping score except for your bank.

By far, my cheapest spending has been items I bought while thrifting. The wife of one of my local CD group members is an avid thrifter and I’ve benefited from her guidance several times when hitting the stores. I really haven’t tracked my spending there, but the least expensive item is probably $5 for a top. and maybe $10 for a dress or shoes. Yes, some were more expensive than that but they were still significantly cheaper than buying new. Plus there is the thrill of the hunt! I encourage you to try out thrifting. Goodwill stores have a policy where every week there is a different color that qualifies for 50% off the tag price. That can really result in a bargain. 

I’ll Be Back

I’d love to hear how you acquired your femme wardrobe. I’ll be back with more Stuff in the next installment. Comments are welcome either here on the blog or by email to Jenn6nov at-sign gmail dot com. JJ is always looking for more stuff so let me know what you would like to read about.

Wearing Stylewe

Alec Guinness femulating on the British stage in Wise Child.

I forgot to title this post!

Would I Be a Femboy If I Were Young Today?

I’ve been thinking about this while re-capping a Heathkit power supply and waiting for the soldering iron to come back up to temperature.

Back when I was young, if you were a boy who liked skirts, soft fabrics or anything vaguely feminine, there wasn’t a subreddit for it. There certainly wasn’t a TikTok trend with pastel lighting and thigh-highs. There was just you, your secret interests and a very strong cultural suggestion that you keep those interests to yourself.

I grew up identifying first as a ham radio nerd, then a computer nerd. I was the kid who preferred manuals to footballs, oscilloscopes to engines. I liked precision, systems, patterns. In hindsight, it probably shouldn’t surprise anyone (including me) that I also liked the ritual of femininity: the careful coordination of clothes, the technical challenge of makeup, the quiet satisfaction of “getting it right.”

At the time, though, crossdressing wasn’t framed as identity or expression. It was framed as something you did despite yourself, not because of yourself. You either hid it, joked about it or treated it as a guilty pleasure best compartmentalized like a forbidden frequency you never logged.

Fast-forward a few decades.

Now I look around and see young men who openly call themselves femboys, often unapologetically, sometimes joyfully. They’re tech-savvy, online, ironic, self-aware. Many of them are exactly the sort of kids who, in my day, would have been building PCs from spare parts or memorizing band plans.

And that’s where the uncomfortable question sneaks in:

If I were 19 today instead of… well, decidedly not 19, would I be one of them?

Honestly? Probably.

The aesthetic experimentation, the blending of masculinity and femininity, the playful refusal to take traditional gender rules seriously—it all feels very familiar. The difference is that today there’s language, community and visibility. What I experienced as isolation and confusion, they experience as a label and a feed.

I don’t feel envy, exactly. I’ve earned my wrinkles, my call signs, my hard-won confidence. But I do feel a strange kind of recognition. Watching these young men feels like seeing an alternate timeline version of myself... one who didn’t have to wait to stop worrying so much about what the civilians might think.

Am I a femboy now? No. I’m a senior crossdresser with bifocals, a well-organized radio shack and a closet that finally reflects who I’ve always been.

But if I were young today?

I suspect I’d still be a nerd. I suspect I’d still love systems, signals and aesthetics.

And yes, I suspect I’d be posting outfit pics between firmware updates, wondering why anyone ever thought these things were incompatible.

Funny how some signals take decades to propagate.

Wearing ShopBop

Paweł Góral femulating Céline Dion on Polish television‘s Twoja Twarz Brzmi Znajomo.
Click here to view this femulation on YouTube.

Busy as a Bee

I’ve been very busy over the past two weeks dealing with weather-related issues and health concerns—both mine and my wife’s. As a result, this blog has suffered a bit, with fewer posts than usual.

By the end of the day, I find it far more relaxing to create amusing images for the blog than to write new text. Writing is hard work; making funnies is fun.

I could easily write volumes about the ringleader in the White House, but I have no desire to sully the blog with that. As Thumper once wisely said, “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say nothin’ at all.” So so it goes.

Wearing Leau

Sebastian Muntean femulating Amy Winehouse on Romania’s version of television's Your Face Sounds Familiar.
Click here to view this femulation on YouTube.

What’s Shaking? Redux

Thank you all who emailed or commented about my Parkinson’s disease diagnosis. Your kind words and positive thoughts truly warmed my heart and encouraged me to keep on keeping on.

One reader, “Unknown,” commented, “The fact that you titled this post, ‘What’s shaking?’ indicates that you can handle this diagnosis.” Perhaps—but I chose that title because I try to emphasize the lighter side of life… even when dealing with dreadful things like Parkinson’s—or, dare I say, crossdressing.

By the way, I started my medication on Saturday and have already noticed an improvement. I’m taking carbidopa/levodopa, a combination drug that helps restore the dopamine in the brain that the disease has taken.

And so it goes.

Wearing Maje

Matteo Cetinski femulating Petra Dugandžić on Croatian television’s Your Face Sounds Familiar.
Click here to view this femulation on YouTube.

Stuff 108: Giving Back

By J.J. Atwell

Supporting Others

I’m in a somewhat reflective mood as I compose this installment of Stuff. I was thinking about how much I’ve grown in the CD world. (I might need a diet – that’s a joke). Although I’ve been a CD since childhood, it’s only in the past few years that I’ve actually stepped out in public. 

I remember the first time I went out as my femme self. I had been dressing at home for years, but that didn’t prepare me for that huge step to go to my first group meeting. Sure, the physical aspect was in place. I had a wardrobe. I had a wig, shoes, etc. All I needed was the courage. 

The Cowardly Lion from The Wizard of Oz comes to mind. First I needed to make a phone call to a representative of the group to introduce myself and find out the meeting details. That itself took a fair amount of resolve, but i went ahead with it. With that behind me, there was no reason to further delay. 

The date for the group meeting arrived. I spent some extra time selecting the outfit. Getting dressed and fussing with my wig. Slapping on some makeup without really knowing what I was doing. What I remember the most was what I was thinking as I drove to the meeting site. Pulling out of my garage and wondering if any neighbors noticed. Sitting at a stop light wondering if the pedestrian crossing the street realized that I wasn’t what I was trying to appear to be. Feeling of the car shoulder harness between my boobs. How wearing heels felt different when driving. And how the wig restricted my peripheral vision. 

Many of you have had those feelings and more. Some of you have not yet experience that. I’m asking those of you who have experience to give back. It’s time for you to help others find their way. 

How to Help

Being a good person is a start. Try to be friendly with all the other CDs you’ll meet on your journey. Give them the benefit of your experience, but don’t be overbearing or come across as an authority figure. Offer help where it’s wanted. Exchange your knowledge with others. And continue to learn from them. 

I try to give back by doing all that. You’re familiar with my writings here on Femulate. I’m also active in some online communities. In my local CD group, I write a column for the monthly newsletter and last year I served as vice president. That’s what works for me. But it’s not necessarily what you should do. Think about what you are good at instead and try to share that in whatever way you can. 

Be especially aware of newly out CDs. They’ve got lots of questions on their minds but may be too afraid to actually ask questions. So start up a conversation about anything. Even if it’s only the weather. Compliment them on some aspect of their outfit. Tell them what you were feeling on your first outing. Encourage them to tell you what they found most difficult or fun about getting out of the house. Give advice only when asked. Above all, listen.

I’ll Be Back

There will be more Stuff. As always comments are welcome either here on the blog or by email to Jenn6nov at -sign gmail dot com. JJ is always looking for more stuff, so if there is something you would like to read about, please let me know!

Wearing Boston Proper

Damir Kedžo femulating Ariana Grande on Croatian television’s version of Your Face Sounds Familiar.
Click here to view this femulation on YouTube.