Stuff 117: Pageant!

By J.J. Atwell

I Did It Again

Regular readers of Stuff may recall a three-part story about participating in a beauty pageant. Stana published Stuff #86, 87 and 88 in September 2025. This year our local group held its third beauty pageant. There were five contestants, of which I was one. There would have been six =, but one had to back out at the last minute for personal reasons. 

A quick summary of how the evening went is that the pageant consisted of three parts; Fancy Dress, Talent and Beach Wear. There were three impartial judges and an MC who introduced us individually. The MC read our CV’s as we walked on stage. After we were all introduced, the judges asked us to say a little bit about ourselves and how we feel that being a CD has helped us better live our lives. 

Talent

We all have our unique skills! I’m not one of those people, but I decided to try stand-up comedy. I played a distant cousin of Julia Child and showed everyone how to make Coq au Vin. It was a hit! Other contestants showcased their musical abilities and another one also did a comedy routine. I was particularly impressed with one sister who played the keyboard while wearing a beautiful, piano-themed outfit with a voluminous skirt and incredibly high heels. 

Beachwear

This category was particularly difficult for me and for most of the other participants. Fortunately the category was not actually about bathing suits but rather about what a person might wear on the way to the beach. That what we could avoid the kind of exposure that sunscreen doesn’t cover. 

I found a blue skirted one-piece suit that covered all that must be covered. Over that I went with a gauzy coverup and matching flip-flops. I also carried a beach bag with a towel and a fan which I attempted to use as a prop. Not sure I carried that off though. 

The other participants were similarly attired with some more daring that others. One of our members regularly uses a breast plate and this was put to good effect in the beachwear portion. 

Dressing Room

We were fortunate that the venue has a separate area that we used as a dressing room for costume changes. We all arrived in ordinary female streetwear and changed outfits for each of the sections in that room. I must say it was a bit odd to see each other in various stages of transition. Imagine watching a wig change. Or holding onto breast forms while swapping out bras. Yes, we saw it all. 

The judges had a very difficult time selecting this year’s Miss FEM Florida. Only one point separated the winner Cathy from runner-up Heather. Our winner was given a beautiful crown and sash commemorating the event. Sorry that I can’t post any pictures from this event, but I don’t have authorizations from the participating members. 

I’ll Be Back

It was a fun experience and I look forward to participating in next year’s event. Until then, I’ll be finding more Stuff to write about. I welcome comments and suggestions here on Stana’s page or by email at Jenn6nov at-sign gmail dot com.

Wearing Boston Proper

Robin Williams femulating in an episode of television’s Mork & Mindy.