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| Stana at Websterbank on Halloween |
But what if you have no party to attend?
Who says you need one?
Instead of sitting home waiting for an invitation that may never arrive, put on your favorite outfit, apply your makeup, grab your handbag and go out among the civilians. Halloween itself is the event and the whole world is the party.
You do not have to wear a costume. In fact, I suggest dressing as the woman you want to be rather than as a comic exaggeration of one. Wear something attractive and appropriate for wherever you plan to go. You can visit a shopping mall, browse a department store, stop for coffee, enjoy dinner at a restaurant or take in a movie. Even a simple trip to the pharmacy can become a memorable adventure when it is your first time out en femme.
Halloween provides a little extra protection for the nervous beginner. People are accustomed to seeing unusual clothing, elaborate makeup and unexpected characters. If someone reads you, they will probably assume that your feminine presentation is your Halloween costume—and then continue with whatever they were doing.
Meanwhile, you get to experience something much more meaningful than attending a costume party. You get to walk through the real world as a woman.
At a party, everyone may stare because costumes are the evening’s entertainment. Out among the civilians, most people are too busy shopping, eating, talking or looking at their phones to pay much attention to you. You may discover that the frightening reactions you imagined never happen. The sales associate may call you “Ma’am.” Someone may hold a door for you. Another woman may compliment your dress, shoes or handbag.
You might even forget that you are supposed to be nervous.
If this is your first outing, make it easy on yourself. Choose a familiar, well-lit place where other people will be around. Go during daylight or early evening, know where you will park and avoid areas that become rowdy later at night. If possible, invite a supportive friend to accompany you. Most importantly, dress appropriately for your destination and behave as though you belong there because you do.
You need not spend the entire evening out. Promise yourself that you will walk through one store or order one cup of coffee. Once you have accomplished that, you can go home feeling victorious. Of course, you may feel so comfortable that one stop becomes two, and two stops become an entire evening.
Halloween may give you the excuse to open the door, but you must be the one willing to walk through it.
So, if no invitation arrives this Halloween, do not be disappointed. Create your own celebration. Get dressed, go out and mingle with the civilians.
The best Halloween party may be the one happening everywhere.
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| Wearing Cynthia Rowley |
.png "Michel Serrault en femme in the French film La Cage aux Folles.") |
| Michel Serrault en femme in the French film La Cage aux Folles. |
I posted yesterday my Halloween outings. I bought doughnuts at a Winchell's Donut House where the woman cashier complimented my presentation. Another occasion is was buying soda at a Safeway. The cashier there was a young woman and probably knew zip about cross dressers, even on Halloween. The male customer in front of me was half drunk and buying beer. He burst out in a false laugh. I dare say he should not have been allowed to buy more beer. I hope he did not hit anyone. I always tried to avoid human contact when it was not Halloween. I know many discourage strolls in the evening, but I took strolls in the early darkness in a residential neighborhood that has a lot of small shops and restaurants. I only wore dresses and heels. The best time to stroll was in the fall when it was dark early and especially when there was a light rain, necessitating an umbrella which did a good job of obstructing my obvious male face. If I wanted to look like I belong out alone, as a woman alone, I carried a tote with the logo of the Safeway grocery store. That gave this woman a purpose to be on the street.
ReplyDeleteGreat ideas Anon. There are some great tote bags like Traders Joe to provide cover. Just pop into a few stores to get halloween treats on the way home from work. If you work from home as a maid, please change to business attire for the errands. Stopping into Payless for Sz 11 BOGO optional.
DeleteThis is fabulous advice for people who may not have a Halloween party to attend. And I'm glad you clarified to "wear something attractive and appropriate for wherever you plan to go". I may have looked a little silly and out-of-place if I wore my French maid costume to the coffee shop and bank and pharmacy...😘😂
ReplyDeleteohh Elise darling you have set my mind racing. the thought if you in a french maid costume going to the bank ….oh wow 🔥🔥🔥🔥 now i’ve never suggested anything like that to my mother-in-law but just maybe Halloween brings the opportunity? ❤️❤️
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